And if they don't get it, it's their problem. I'm done trying. I need to let them come to me

Both of us constantly look for something that is just around the corner. Love, friendship, a great book. One more step and we're there. But we keep looking. We go back or we stand still or we cross the street, we never keep going forward. Why? Why is it so hard for us to make a move? Something that is so simple to anyone else. Everybody does that. But not me. Or you. Not the people who deserve it cause they worked so hard to get to that corner. And I don't know, sometimes I feel like I should stop looking for whatever I'm looking for. And I tell myself to breath and live my life. But it breaks me. Every time, it breaks me. I spend days just sitting in my room, thinking about every little stupid detail of my life. And I hate to feel sorry for myself so I blame the whole stupid existence that is me, and I give up on everything, and I quit living, but hope is still there. So after a few days I get up and I live my life. For months, I'm doing perfectly fine. And I make a progress. But I never seem to actually get to that place I'm looking for. I just go in circles and I end up being the exact same person I was six years ago. Sure, I read some new books and met some new people but I'm still me, the fool who is looking for a life that doesn't exist